Counselling
Being human isn’t easy. Counselling can give you support while you make changes or cope with difficult life events.
When things go wrong, “The same damn thing over and over” - we try to change ourselves using will power, “Let me stop doing that”. Or we try to reason ourselves out of the problem. Or we reproach or punish ourselves. These attempts can work, but often they leave us feeling worse.
There is another way.
We are interaction. We are not interacting.
- Eugene Gendlin
Human nervous systems have evolved to help each other. When we feel safe with another person we relax some of the patterns that limit us. When our body knows it is safe we relate to others and ourselves in more flexible ways. We think creatively about our lives and find we know what we want to do.
The other person has to be worthy of trust. If you weren’t safe in the past (all of us have some experience of this) you may find it hard to trust. You may find you are stuck in patterns that protected you once but are limiting now. If trust has not been there during past experiences such as trauma it can be established, first in therapy and then in the rest of your life.
Life is so difficult. Why would we be anything but kind?
- Sylvia Boorstein
I’ll be listening kindly: I won’t be judging. You can describe your situation in your own way. As you start to feel safe you discover an ability to listen to yourself kindly. It’s not always an easy process (though it can be) because relaxing self-protecting patterns leaves us vulnerable.
The aim is to find ways of relating to yourself and others that work better for you. Between sessions you can experiment with new behaviour, knowing you have the support of the next session to evaluate your progress.
Being kind to ourselves and finding our own safety can be a lifelong journey. I hope counselling helps you get over a difficult stage along the way.
Please see my experience approach and training
Arrange a call so we can discuss working together.